How a Life Story Conversation Can Lead To a Better, Long-Lasting Relationship with Mike O’Krent of Life Stories Alive

[David] Listeners every once while you met someone and you hear about what they're doing and you go, wow, I got to share that with more people. I recently ran into our guest at a place that we both find really relaxing and refreshing to go to. And he was just had that presence about him. I go like, let me introduced myself to this guy and I did. And then he started telling me like we all do, what do you do for a living? And he shared me his story and folks, I'm really excited to share this with you. Now here's why we're all looking for a way in which we can uniquely identify ourselves in the marketplace. And some of that comes by what we do for others. And so as you listen to this interview, consider, is this something you would like to do for one of your top employees as a way to honor them or their family? Is it something you do for one of your clients that's really special for you or a special relationship? But I want you to listen to it with this kind of critical thinking in mind. I am going to be using our guest to record special family memories and have it there for generations to come. Joining me on the microphone today is Mike O'Krent. Mike, good to have you here. [Mike] I'm so happy to be here. Thank you, David. [David] It's just a joy to meet you the first time I did meet you. And then to get a chance to now get you on the podcast, because I do believe in what you're doing is something that's really unique. And I'm very excited about it now, Mike, you're the founder of Life Stories, the live LLC is a business specialized in making Personal history, legacy videos for families, businesses, and nonprofit organizations. And this all started when you had a life changing experience back in 1996. Tell us about it and how it brought you to where you're at today. [Mike] Well, I had an amazing opportunity that sometimes it comes to you and you really don't know how much it will affect the rest of your life. But between 1996 and 2000, I was very fortunate to be trained by the best in the world. I interviewed Holocaust survivors for Steven Spielberg's Survivors of the Shoah Visual History Foundation. Now it's called the USC Shoah Foundation. And for those years, I had the opportunity to interview about 30 of those Holocaust survivors. And it's one of those things that changes your life. And all I did was ask questions and listen. [David] That's got to be some of the most riveting conversations anyone could have because they had life experiences that were horrific and to understand what they went through and to be able to memorialize that for their family members. Are there a lot of Holocaust survivors today? I think most of them I would imagine had passed on. [Mike] That is correct. Most of them, because of age, have passed along. And if there are still some survivors that are alive, they were children or they were very, very young during the Holocaust, which of course happened between the 19, probably about 1939 to 1945 when World War II ended. And this is the Holocaust that happened, of course, in Nazi-occupied Germany. [David] Well, how did you come across Steven Spielberg? How did that happen? [Mike] Well, again, it's one of those things that it's a Godsend. I was volunteering with the Jewish Federation of San Antonio. I'm born and raised in San Antonio. And they have a wonderful Holocaust education program. So backtrack to about 1993 when Spielberg is filming Schindler's List in Poland, survivors were coming up to him and saying, I have a story I want to tell you. And in his genius, he had this idea of capturing the life stories of Holocaust survivors because he knew that within a short few years, their stories would be buried with him. So he started this foundation with the idea of interviewing 50,000 survivors all over the world. We interviewed 53,000 plus in about 29 languages all over the world. and we didn't solicit survivors. [David] Very short period of time, yeah. [Mike] As survivors from Austin and San Antonio in South Texas started to call in wanting to be interviewed, the foundation sent a letter to the Jewish Federation of San Antonio, who has a wonderful Holocaust education program that I was a teacher of. They sent the letter saying, we need volunteers to come at their own expense to fly to Los Angeles and be trained how to do this. And I thought, my God, what an opportunity. So I did. [David] What a opportunity, [Mike] Yeah. And so I guess I was the only one from this area and I was the guy who interviewed the survivors in Austin and San Antonio and all over South Texas. [David] Well, kudos to you for jumping at that opportunity. When opportunity knocks, how many times do we answer the door? And so you did, and it's launched you into a very exciting business. Now, take us from there to what you're doing today. [Mike] Some people say, you a psychologist? And the answer is no. Were you trained in the journalism department at SMU where I went to school? And the answer is no. at the time that I did this, I was the fourth generation in a retail carpet and flooring business, which has nothing to do with interviewing people for their life stories. And so after 25 years in that business, I got out of it and a business coach helped me connect with how much I love doing that. [David] No, absolutely. [Mike] Long story short, and 19 years ago I started Life Stories Alive doing it for regular moms, dads, and grandmas and grandpas. And it's so much fun. It is just so much fun. [David] Yeah. Tell us some stories, give us an idea. And I want to get into how you do it and what's involved in a minute, but what are some of the memorable stories that really stand out in your mind. [Mike] Wow, there are so many. I've done hundreds and hundreds of these. Well, if you like Ted Talks, I gave a TEDx talk a few years ago. in this TEDx talk, I talk about the most challenging, yet the most rewarding life story I ever did was my own mom's. Because when you do your own mom's life story, you can ask questions that you would never ask anybody else. [David] I love TED Talks. you did. That's right. I saw that. [Mike] And so I show this clip and it happens to be a humorous clip. Should I give away the secret before people watch it? Yeah, I'll go ahead and do that. Right. So I have two brothers, right. And the interviews that I do are chronologically conducted. So we're at the point where she already got married. I'm talking about her wedding and having kids and the kids are growing up. And I say, I have a very important question to ask you, mom. And I want you to think about this because I want an honest answer. [David] Yeah, go ahead and it. Yeah, it takes a little bit to do it, Right. [Mike] Which one of your three sons is your favorite? She just started cracking up. said, come on, mom, I know it's your middle child, me, and let's fess up. [David] Yeah, that's, she did a brilliant job of handling that one. got to tell you, she was one savvy mama. That's amazing. [Mike] Yeah, she did. So as you can imagine, to answer your question further, David, I've interviewed people who are ill. And terminally ill people have a different perspective of life. I've interviewed very, very successful people, billionaires, as a matter of fact, in some cases. And I've also interviewed just regular people. And each story is unique, but each story [David] Yeah, I can understand. Every one of our lives are skewed. [Mike] One of the most common things that I hear from the people who I'm going to interview is, I don't know why my son wants me to do this. I'm just a simple person. What have I done special? [David] Why would anyone be interested in my story? Yeah, I can imagine you'd hear that, yeah. [Mike] And so, I ask each one of your listeners, what makes your parent or somebody that you love, what makes their story uninteresting? And they think, my God, it's my mom. Of course, her stories are interesting. Of course, she has lessons learned from the things that she went through in her life that should be passed down to future generations. And so in my mind, every story is interesting. And the way I was trained to do it, things will come out that they've never thought about. And that's what makes it fun for me. [David] Well, yeah, I think the fact that you were trained by Steven Spielberg or his team to be able to bring these out creates a unique skillset because both my parents have passed on a number of years ago, been gone now for a while. And we wanted to record as many things. So back then we recorded videos or audio files as best we could and try to hang onto them. But we weren't trained in doing it. And now I look back on it, especially after listening to your Ted talk, which by the way, we'll put a link to that TED Talk listeners in this episode. You can go listen to it because it was really well done. But it really brings out an importance of people telling this story and again, the argument you get is why would anyone want my story? It's inconsequential. Every life is consequential. Every life is important and there's something, if not for anyone else but for your heirs, for your. [Mike] Thank you. [David] As they get passed on, and I think the more authentic. It's interesting, my oldest daughter and her husband, our granddaughter, were just here celebrating Christmas this past weekend. And I did not expect this happening, and it certainly wasn't related to our interview, but they gave me a journal that asked me all these questions. They asked me to fill out all this information. They're buying one for my wife as well, and we'll both fill out in writing our words about our life experience, all these things. [David] And some of the questions are in there seem a bit prying and invasive. And I go like, why do I want to talk about my first love, my first crush, all those experiences. But I think it's what makes who we are. Each one of these questions. And when you have someone like yourself who will ask questions that's professionally trained by the best, Steven Spielberg, just undisputably is the best. To think that you have someone that can record the stories like that, Mike, it's just so powerful. Give us another story that stands out in your mind about someone who's a business person that already passed on and what it's meant to them and their children. [Mike] The legal profession is also a business and I'll never forget a particular very successful trial lawyer in Houston that I did a life story for his daughter here in Austin hired me to interview dad and mom. So I interviewed couples together, but I'll never forget what he said. One of the greatest lessons that I've learned from his life story is he was talking about toward the end of all of these interviews. One of the questions I asked is, you have any regrets? as you look back on the life that you've led, do you have any regrets? And he thought for a moment, and then I'll never forget, he said, you know, I remember day after day, morning after morning, kissing my three kids goodbye before I went to work in the morning while they were still asleep. And then that night I came home and kissed them good night after they were already in bed. Year after year. And then he paused and he said, I missed out on their childhood and you know, there's one thing to being successful and what that means. And there's another thing to another meaning of success. And, you know, I don't think there's an actual balance that they call a work-life balance. But I think if we make every effort that we can to do what we can to spend the time with those who are important to us, be it work or family, because both of those are important. That's one of the lessons that I learned from his life story. And that can apply to any business person, quite frankly. [David] That's really good. so many of us struggle with work-life balance and we have not spent the time with our families. But that's why your service is so valuable, because you're gonna be able to bring their life, this person, whoever the interviewee is, you're gonna bring their life story out and share it with the kids, or they may not have heard these stories. And I think it's such a powerful thing. So it's appropriate that we're doing this around the Christmas holidays, giving as a gift to people. But I'm also thinking about this being a very powerful gift, appreciation to someone. Like it's a family portrait. You given a family portrait or you spend money to do this. This is far more impactful. Nothing against family portraits, all for family portraits. But they don't tell the backstory, what's going on in the heads and the hearts of the people that had been going on all their life. I think it's just outstanding for you to do this and I wanted our listening audience to go, now that is really a unique idea. I can think of this person, most likely you'll start thinking of their own family members. how Mike, how I wish I had met you before my mom and dad had passed away. I would have spent the money to do this. It's priceless, you see, it doesn't matter how much it costs because the memories and having a video of them talking about the things that you draw out in the interviews. That would be priceless to me in these years after they've been gone for a long time. And I think you said that your mom passed away not that long after you did the video of her, is that correct? [Mike] That is correct. Two years after I did her life story, mom died. And now whenever I am missing her, only, know, books about people's stories are great. Don't get me wrong. But the reason I do video is because it brings out the senses. I get to hear her voice and I get to feel the love that she had for me and my brothers. And, my God. [David] Yeah, no, it's good, but nothing like hearing it. [Mike] I get my fix. Whenever I'm missing mom, I know exactly where to go on the video and I'm okay. And it's not just the things that happen in one's life, like my mom's story and like every story that I do, but it's the lessons learned from what happens because I hear from people all the time, I don't know that I want to talk about this because it's a traumatic part of my life, but it's part of your life. And it's not just what happened. I learned this from the Holocaust survivors. It's how do you handle it? what lessons can be learned from what happened to you or by you? And that's so, so important to pass down to future generations. Because what parent that you know doesn't want their children to make the same, you they don't want their children to make the same mistakes they made. And how do you do that? Well, you pass the story down and you say, don't do this because I did this, you know, sometimes. [David] Wow. Are there various packages that you have for doing this? I think people are getting what we're talking about here, especially over the holidays. There's a heart for sentiment in the holidays anyway. But as they are listening to this, Mike, is there different packages where you can do this at different levels? full exhaustive videography of them and a condensed down. Do you have different programs or packages that they can utilize? [Mike] Yeah, I do a full life story and I'll either do an individual. can do couples, married couples or otherwise. I do siblings interviews and they're always a blast. You know, four siblings sitting on the couch together. You can imagine what those are like. I can do multi-generational ones, whether that takes one day or multiple days to do. But I do want to offer your listeners a package that I've never offered before, quite frankly. And I will offer this because Zoom or video conferencing is available. How about life chapters? So we can do this. I want to offer a one hour interview with one chapter of their life. Whether it be, and I got four categories for you, either a love story is one category, a work story could be one category, one chapter. [David] Chapters. I love that. Yes. [Mike] Youth stories, what it was like growing up until you got married or whatever is another category. And the fourth category is generational, the generational stories. Well, we can go through family trees. can go through past, present, and future generations, just talking about family, where they come from and who they are and what they want their future generations to be. That's a generational story. So one of those four categories, I'd be happy to offer that in, is it okay to give a price for that? I can offer that and it's a video life story and what we will do, we'll do it on zoom. So there's no travel expenses. There's not any of that. My editors will be able to edit it to make it look clean and we can put in some photographs and things. So it won't be just a talking head. So it'll be professionally done for just $500. [David] That is a bargain, especially when you think of a realtor you're working with, loan officers you're working with, first of all, I think one of the best gifts you could give, everyone's looking for a good gifts to give someone who closed on a new home. Why not give them a gift like this? they'll remember that forever, especially if they can figure out a way of putting your name provided by your loan officer, your name as a producer, something like that. I think there'd just be so many opportunities to take and do something really unique and we're all looking for a way to make us unique in this commoditized world that we live in. And listeners, you know the challenge there is for doing that. We give cheese platters, we get bottles of wine, we give all these things and they're nice. I remember getting my doorknob from my first mortgage lender when I got it. I go, that was nice, but that's gone. I don't know where that's at. But had they recorded one of my life stories or recorded one of my parents or something like that, and shared it with me. Wow, would that been ever good. So I think that's a great product, Mike. Thank you so much for offering that to our listeners. Appreciate that. [Mike] You're welcome or they could give a full life story. And if they gift it to the person who bought the home or their client, their client can say, well, I don't want my life story. want my mom and dad's life story. It's a really unique gift for like a 50th wedding anniversary or 25th wedding anniversary, a special birthday. The average age of the people that I interview now is about 82 years old, but I've interviewed from 40 to 105. I've interviewed six people that are a hundred years old and older and it makes for a really, you know, for the person who you, what do I give them? They've got everything. Well, more than likely, they don't have the gift of their life story in a full documentary, Ken Burns type way. And that's what I do. [David] That's awesome. Well, we're going to get together. I'm to have you record one for my wife and I to give to our kids. think that'd be just a wonderful Christmas gift. We'll give that out next year. And I'm thinking about, yeah, it's expensive, but it's worth it to do the full package. But for those that are looking for an opportunity to create a unique value, a give back to the borrower or to the realtor or anyone involved in the transaction or special employees that you have working for you. This is a powerful tool. Mike, I'm so glad I ran into you and I'm so excited about the stories that come out of this interview and what can be shared with people. So how can people get ahold of you, Mike? Reach you? [Mike] Thank you. Yes, you can reach me by email at mokrent, m-o-k-r-e-n-t @ lifestoriesalive.com, L-i-f-e-s-t-o-r-i-e-s-a-l-i-v-e.com, or my website is lifestoriesalive.com. And there's a contact page on there, a tab there that you can contact me and let's have a conversation. Even if you just are thinking about this and I'm not sure, let's just have a conversation. I'm not a huge and I'm not a good salesperson at all, quite frankly, but I'd be happy to answer any questions that you have about this. And I'd love to do one of these chapter stories for some of your listeners out [David] That's good, it'd be a great opportunity for them and for their customers and a way to make them unique. Yeah, go ahead. [Mike] Yeah. I want to mention one more thing. And one of the things that is kind of a synopsis of why I do what I do. There was a book written in the the late two thousands, called Sarah's Key and they made a movie out of it. And the last thing you hear in the movie, Sarah's Key that was made, that was released in 2011. The last thing you hear in that movie is the following. A voiceover will say, when a story is told, it's not forgotten. It becomes something else the memory of who we were and the hope of what we can become. So if your listeners want to know of the hope of what they can become, the story needs to be told. [David] Wow. That's so good. Hard to end on any better note than that. Mike, thank you so much. What a joy to meet you here recently. I'm at the beginning of what I hope to be a long-term friendship. I honor you for what you're doing and I'm so thrilled to have met you. Listeners, you have the contact information. You can also get it from the links inside of these show notes, but reach out to Mike, whatever you do. I think it'll be a wonderful gift. Happy holidays, Mike. Appreciate you so much. [Mike] Thank you Happy holidays to you, David. Thank you so much. This has been an honor and it's been a lot of fun. I appreciate it. [David] I appreciate it as well.

Important Links:

• Life Stories Alive website
• Ted Talk - Mike O'Krent
• LinkedIn - Mike O'Krent

Mike O'Krent is the founder of LifeStories Alive, LLC, a business specializing in the making of personal history “legacy” videos for families, businesses, and non-profit organizations.

In a life-changing experience, from 1996 through 2000 Mike interviewed Holocaust survivors for Steven Spielberg’s Survivors of the Shoah Visual History Foundation, now the USC Shoah Foundation. It was through that experience he discovered the significance and technique of recording the life stories of loved ones, which forms the basis for his LifeStories business. Since founding the business in 2006, Mike has expanded its expertise beyond capturing personal histories for families to now include recording the histories of businesses and non-profit organizations. The professionally produced videos can be used externally to promote the organization or internally as a training tool for new employees/volunteers. In 2022 he founded ConvoMasters, an online membership that helps people build better relationships through better conversations.